Sunday, December 23, 2007

My Own Christmas Miracle

I had a miracle happen today, my own Christmas miracle. I was called as choir director for our ward. For those of you who are not of the LDS faith, I was asked to direct the Choir for my church, purely voluntary. My Bishop said he was inspired to ask me -HA! I didn't believe him, and I even went as far as telling him he missed the mark.

I grumbled for weeks and finally started having choir practice to get ready for the Christmas program in 8 weeks. Despite what my friends think, this was such a difficult thing for me. I will admit that in my youth, things came easy to me. I could sing in front of a crowd and felt little fear in front of people. But I have changed over the years. As I have struggled with health problems and different things in my life, I seemed to have lost my confidence. I am incredibly forgetful and I cringe at the thought of people looking to me and relying on me to lead them.

Practices moved along and I did my homework and tried my hardest. But I have to tell you that this white girl has NOOOOOO rhythm. I wrestled with my hands, trying to make them do what my mind was thinking. The choir was patient with me and I continually fumbled the cut offs and cues.

The day of the performance arrived and I wanted to throw up as I sat there waiting for the program to begin. And then it came to me. If the Bishop was really inspired to call me as choir director, then I am doing exactly what the Lord wants me to do. I realized at that moment that this did not have to be my burden. I have done everything in my power to make this a success and now it was His turn to come through for me. I prayed harder than ever and told God that I was done. Now it was His turn to make my hands do what they needed to do. I wasn't going to be nervous because if this is what He wants, then He had better be there helping me. (Are you allowed to get a little bossy in your prayers? - cause I was). I wasn't asking for His help, I was DEMANDING it.

The program began, and I was nervous at first. But something happened - magic! The choir sounded like angels. Things that weren't working before, now came together like chocolate and peanut butter. I couldn't believe my ears. I felt the excitement swell within me as we went along and I was able to hit every cue and cut off. I didn't want it to end. I prayed that the people in the choir and in the congregation would feel the true spirit of Christmas. And you know what? I think they did. I realized through this whole thing, that it's not about me. God has a bigger purpose and I was just glad to be apart of it.

This was my miracle and I am sharing it with you.
Merry Christmas!

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